Fashion

I don’t know about you guys but 2019 was an interesting year for me, I can’t say it was the hardest or the worst so I think interesting is the best word to use. Transition was a major theme in my personal life as well as my work life and I found myself constantly having to adjust which was frustrating but necessary. Here are a few things that I learned or relearned this year and over the past decade.

1. Overextending myself does not equal love. I’ve seen this quote a few times recently on Instagram and it resonates with me so much because I am the QUEEN of overextending myself. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve bent over backwards (mostly in my romantic relationships) only to have it not appreciated, dismissed, or not be enough to make the person stay. No matter what you do for someone if they don’t think you are “the one” it will never be enough. You don’t need to prove anything, if you are genuine and your intentions are pure everything will speak for itself. Who and what is for you will always be for you without you having to jump through hoops to have it!
2. It’s all about ME. I’m absolutely on my Mya vibes with this one. My therapist said this to me one day and it kept replaying in my mind and you know what? She’s right. For the most part what happens to me and for me is in my control, what I do to reach my goals is on ME, how I react to situations is on ME, who I allow to waste my time is on ME and its on you too! Basically what I’m trying to say is put yourself first because nothing bad can ever come from focusing on YOU, it will only help you get better. I’ve made the mistake of unintentionally putting my happiness in the hands of someone else other than myself and it usually lead to disappointment, I had to learn that I am the only person responsible for my happiness and anyone else who comes along can add to that.
3. Skincare is important! I still get carded or mistaken for an 18 year old which is fine with me but just because I look young doesn’t mean my skin isn’t aging. I turned 30 this past year and while I’m blessed with decent skin I really started paying more attention to my skincare routine and trying out products that will be beneficial to the overall health of my skin. If you wear makeup regularly PLEASE take care of your skin, we still want to look our best on natural days as well! Find products that work for your skin type and get serious about your routine, it’s the time of day when you get to pamper yourself and it also improves makeup application if your skin is already in good shape.
4. Slow down! Rushing gives me anxiety. It took me a while to realize me having just enough time to do something or make it to work was actually having an affect on me so I started making it a point to give myself more time. I feel so much better when I’m not speed walking and worrying about being late, also having enough time to stretch, meditate, and have breakfast comfortably sets the tone for my day. If you find yourself always rushing and feeling flustered try to get on a schedule that allows you to get enough sleep and wake up on time or maybe a few minutes earlier to get the day started.
5. Believe in yourself! I honestly think those who are successful and live the lives they always dreamed of are the people who believe in themselves and never allowed others to place limitations on them. Your vision is for you and a lot of people might not understand it at first (if ever) and that is NOT your problem, all you have to do everyday is show up for yourself and work for what you want. I had to start showing up for myself because who else is going to achieve these goals for me? I’ve done a lot of planning and wrote countless notes and lists about the things I want to do but you know what was missing? Action. So for 2020 my theme is consistent action. If I am consistently active with manifesting AND working for the things I want I know good things will happen to me and for me.
6. Life will snatch your edges! And your wig and your pearls. My life is nothing that I thought it would be at this age because my path was far from straight and narrow. And every year when I think I know something life shows me that I still know nothing at all lol. The learning process is constant and even though it can be rough I am always grateful because it made me into the woman I am today, I’ve experienced things that most people would never have to worry about and sometimes it was on a daily basis. When people talk to me and find out the things that I’ve dealt with (and still deal with sometimes) they all say the same thing “I don’t know how you do it, I would have given up already”. Giving up has never been a option because I knew something better had to be on the other side… I am resilient AF and that’s one thing I DO know.

As we go into a new year and a new decade I know I am going to evolve as a woman and I know for a fact that my wardrobe and style will too, for the most part I know what I like and what works for me, my body type and my lifestyle. Recently I’ve been trying to invest in staple pieces and basics that will carry me through the seasons. A good over the knee boot is a wardrobe staple in my opinion and I’ve been on the hunt for some white ones for a few months now. I had my eye on this pair at Zara since early fall and I finally got them on black Friday for $99.50! I think I love them even more because they’re more of a bone instead of stark white and I think that color pairs really well with most things. I am going to do a styling video to show you guys how I wear white boots because I know it can be intimidating even though it is a neutral.

What is your theme or word you want to live by for 2020? Comment down below and let me know!

xoxo, Ash